Design Star Finds Voice

Last night, I watched HGTV crown the new “Design Star,” Meg Caswell. I had watched some throughout the season and the judge’s commentary always made me think of the writer’s voice.

One of the challenges of the Design Star is to meld entertainment and solid interior design, making information fun. While they are at it, the designers must also find their “voice,” their online persona that will carry the show. Much like novelist, they must find a way to bring their personality to bear on the material.

At one point, the judges warned Karl that his “nervous laugh” was getting in the way of his performance. We have nervous laughs, too.

A common commentary–for the Design Star and the novelist–is to relax and be yourself. Yeah, right. With millions watching you expect Meg and Karl to “be themselves”? With readers flocking to your book, your story, editors expect you to be yourself? That advice is helpful? NOT!

In fact, most advice about finding your voice or improving your voice, fail me. I can’t “dig deep into myself and find things I want to express.” I can’t “let my personality flow out through the pen onto the paper.” It’s too vague. I need something solid, something to try.

The Writer’s Voice

Today, I’ll start a series about voice and how to manipulate voice. I approach it not as a mystical thing, but as a matter of practical manipulation of the elements that writers have at hand: words, sentences, passages. We will look at each of these in turn and how they fit together to create the voice of a piece of writing. Join me for the next few weeks to talk about voice.

So, really–did you want Meg or Karl to win?
And–how would you define a writer’s voice?

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Wisdom, the Midway Albatross

by Darcy Pattison

Giveaway ends March 11, 2012.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

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Where did July and August go?

Computer Woes. First, my server has been wonky for the last two weeks–apologies. If you have any difficulty getting to pages, please send me an email so I can straighten it out (darcy at darcypattison dot com).

Travel. For me, this summer included a great two-week trip to China. Our friend of ten years was getting engaged and invited us to the engagement party. Wow, what a great trip. So much to see and do–and we did all the usual things. Beijing in July was very smoggy. But we had a couple clear days to climb the Great Wall and see the Forbidden City. My favorite part was wandering the streets, as you’ll see in this video of a street vendor blowing a caramel-sugar pig:

Research (NOT!) After China, I did research (NOT!). My friend, Dori Butler won the Edgar award this year for the best children’s mystery for her series, The Buddy Files. (IF you haven’t read them, you need to!) She’s working on a new mystery–duh! And doing research: she’s recently shot a Taurus 380 and a Glock 22.40.

Why can’t I do cool research, I wondered? So, I went and had my throat slashed. Well, technically, they called it minor surgery as they took out my thyroid. But I now have the personal experience to go with Dori’s to write that mystery thriller. Hmmm. Maybe I don’t like research so much.

Back to Normal. But all it well here in the mid-South. And I’m back in the saddle with lots of plans for fall!

Plans for Fall.

• Random Acts of Publicity: By Wednesday, I’ll have the complete info posted on this fun week when it’s “All About Your Friend’s Book.”
• And I’m planning a September series on the Writer’s Voice.

So, how was YOUR summer? Any interesting trips, research, writing? Please share your good news!

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Wisdom, the Midway Albatross

by Darcy Pattison

Giveaway ends March 11, 2012.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

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My WIP novel has hit a snag. I was just writing along, following the plot I outlined, concentrating on using strong scenes this time, when I came to a curious section.

Choosing a Point of View Character

Here the main character (MC) needs to be housebound because of a flu epidemic. But the plot requires several events to be happening. Fortunately, the secondary character (SC) is still moving around and could do these events, but then there’s the question of whose POV to use?

NOT the MC, because he won’t be there. But I’ve been writing all this story in 3rd person MC’s POV. Now, two-thirds of the way into the story, I need to use the SC’s POV. And it came out in 1st person. OK. That can happen. A story can have some chapters in 3rd, some in 1st. But then, I rewrote the SC’s POV, trying for an edgier voice and — WOW, I found a great voice for this story.

I’ve been trusting the process to find the voice I needed for the story and suddenly, there it is. But it’s in the SC’s POV. I’ve tried the Voice in the MC’s POV and it works. But does that mean I’ll write alternating POV chapters? If so, how do I distinguish between the MC’s and SC’s voices?

So, I’m struggling. I can’t move on until I make some decisions, because POV and Voice determine so much of a story. It’s not a matter of just “translating” what I’ve done into the new Voice.

Voice Trumps Everything

At this point, I’ve got to revisit some basic decisions about the story, because Voice trumps everything.

So, here are some of the basic questions I’m re-visiting:

• Whose story is this? Who hurts the most and has the most at stake?
• Will the story work with alternating POV? If so, who is the lead character?
• What is the main story I want to tell? If I add in the SC’s POV, then how much more story development does that POV need? I would imagine lots, but the story is already long enough and doesn’t need more length. I’ll need to refocus the story.
• Can I return to what I’ve already got, but replot so the MC can be moving around during that flu epidemic? Do I really need to do all this change? If I stick with the original, will the Voice change be enough? Will it really work for the MC, instead of the SC, where it originally arose?

It’s unsettling times for this story, but there’s no looking back. Voice trumps everything, so I’ve got to tackle this head on and not avoid it. It’s a major detour, but a necessary one.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Wisdom, the Midway Albatross

by Darcy Pattison

Giveaway ends March 11, 2012.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Voice Friday: Word Choices
Voice Friday: Word Connotations
Voice Friday: Word Sounds

One last posting on how words affect voice–though these thoughts on words will echo throughout any discussion of voice.

Newbery winner, Paul Fleischman says, “. . . the sounds of the words on the page, I would like to argue, are as worthy of a writer?s attention as their sense.” See “My House of Voices” on his website.

Children love to play with the sounds of words. Fleischman says, “I?m sure most of us remember as children repeating a phrase over and over as quickly as possible, feeling the words shedding their sense and becoming a collection of vowels and consonants.”

Rhyming, alliteration, consonance–any technique that can highlight the sounds of words, emphasize how they feel in the mouth when you make them, will enhance the reading experience. Fleischman used to listen to short wave radio and tune into Arabic, Japanese or Russian languages, “all unintelligible to me, sounds without sense, verbal music.” Australian author, Mem Fox says writers should plan for “strange and unexpected use of language.”

First some basic phonics

Vowels can be divided into categories based on where the tongue is placed in the mouth and how tight or loose the whole mouth structure becomes when you say the vowel.

VOWELS

High Range–More Energy (high tongue, front of mouth, tight)
Long e Tree
Short i Sit
Long a Play

Middle Range
Long i Bright
Short e Hen
Short a
Cat Oi or oy
Toy Ow
chow

Low Range–Less Energy (low tongue, back of mouth, relaxed)
Ah Far
Aw Bought
Long o Bone
Short oo
Book
Long oo
Boot

Dipthongs are vowels which combine more than one sound:
ow–combines short o with short oo bow
oi–combines long o with long e boy
Long u–y sound with long oo

CONSONANTS

Consonants can be divided into categories based on mouth structure and how the air moves through the mouth.
hard: b, d, k, p, q, t, hard c, hard g, z, ch, j
soft: l, m, n, r, w
Sibilant (hissing sound): s, z, th, sh, zh, ch, f, v
Stopping sounds: b, p, m, n, d, t
Nasal: n, m, ng
Liquid: l, r, w

Using phonics (sounds) to reinforce the tone/mood/meaning of the story

• Use the sounds of words to reinforce or contrast the tone/mood/meaning of a story.
  Vowels: For a lullaby, try to keep as many of the vowels relaxed as possible.
  For action scenes, try for high front vowels.
  Consonants: Do you want the story to be angry? Use hard or nasal or sibilant consonants and high range vowels. Do you want the story soothing? Use soft or liquid consonants and low range vowels Do you want the story irritating? Use nasal or sibilant sounds.
• Use the sound of the names of characters to reinforce or contrast character qualities. Antique sounding words Foreign imports Surnames Meaning Names The Kay-lees and Shay-lees: vigorous start, long, bright vowels, and smooth endings Folktale-like names Character qualities as names?overdone in fantasy, allegory
• Use the sounds of words for emphasis or stress. Emphasis or stress: The greatest stress in a sentence is on the ending syllable, and the second greatest is on the beginning. Put important information/words/phrases in these two positions. The greatest stress is to end a sentence with single syllable word that ends in hard consonant. Example: When John Hercules Po started kindergarten in Room 9B, it was an odd class. There were nineteen girls and one boy, John Hercules. What is the most important word in that first sentence? Odd. It also happens to be a single-syllable word which ends in a hard consonant. See what happens when you move that word to the end of the sentence. Rewritten for emphasis: The kindergarten class in 9B was odd. ?Nineteen girls,? said John Hercules, ?and me.? Think about the last word of the story (or the last word of each section of the story/page): Do you want the door to slam shut on the story? Use a single syllable word ends in hard consonant Do you want the story to linger? Use a nasal or soft consonants. Hum.

These are just hints about the importance of the phonics of words as they impact voice. Word choices do make a difference in voice:

Voice Friday: Word Choices
Voice Friday: Word Connotations
Voice Friday: Word Sounds

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Wisdom, the Midway Albatross

by Darcy Pattison

Giveaway ends March 11, 2012.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

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by Darcy Pattison

This week, I’m revising Paper Lightning: Sparking Student Brainstorming for Effective Prewriting, a teacher resource book that will come out next year. The editor keeps asking me to clarify places and I shoot her back a casual email. She likes “the you” that comes through in the emails and has asked me to include more of that as I revise.

Even in a teacher resource book, which has lots of dry instructions, voice is important. But what is voice? I find it extremely irritating for speakers to say that voice is that “indefinable quality” about writing that you just know when you hear it.

In the last class of my Creative Writing for Children course this semester, the final project was to plot a novel and write the first chapter. Students read the first two pages out loud and each was a study in voice! No two were the same and I definitely wouldn?t confuse Student A’s and Student B’s chapters.

Three Viewpoints on Writer’s Voice

Voice =Personality on the Page

So, in some ways, I would agree with Les Edgerton who says in Finding Your Voice: How to Put Personality into Your Writing, says, voice is your personality on the page. The students’ personalities were evident in their topic, genre, language, sentence structures and every other choice they made in writing the chapter.

When this doesn’t happen, Edgerton says it’s because writers have an inferiority complex and hold themselves back. They modify their writing to meet some imaginary norm. Often this is done in an attempt to appeal to a wider range of audience. A mistake. Find your audience and let your voice speak directly to them.

But saying that Voice is a personality on paper doesn’t help in practical terms, in terms of revising and trying to figure out how to use words, grammar, sentences, passages to express your personality.

Voice = The Effect of Style

Dona J. Hickey in Developing a Written Voice, says Voice is “the writer’s relationship to subject, audience, and occasion as it is revealed through the particular blend of speech patterns you hear as you read.”

In other words, the topic, genre and audience can affect how you write. In a more practical vein, though, she says that, “Voice is the sum effect of all the stylistic choices a writer makes to communicate not only information about a subject but also information about himself or herself to a particular audience.” That begins to bring it into a clearer focus. It’s not just the personality of the writer, but their attitudes, beliefs, feelings about a subject that is conveyed to a certain audience.

Still foggy? Hickey tries to make it even more practical she says that the effect of style is voice. That is, style itself (choices about sentence structure, vocabulary, punctuation, etc.) is found in even technical government documents that have a flat voice; but “the interest is in discovering how certain combinations of stylistic features may create a voice each of us would want to claim as our own.”

Voice = The Right Tone for a Story

So, should we try to “find our voice”? Jane Yolen complicates it a bit more when she says in an excerpt here and in her book, Take Joy: The Writer?s Guide to Loving the Craft, “The story’s voice. That is what must be uncovered, not discovered. It is not the author’s voice, but the true tone of the tale.”

For example, in fantasy, she describes the “bardic voice,” in part, as “full of alliteration, hyperbole. There are chants, lists, spells. Sentences often end in a full stop, the strong stress syllable that reminds the reader of the tolling of a great bell.”

She goes on in the book to describe Schoolboy, Josephus, Boogerman, Dark Angel, Midtown Mab, Dave Broder and Hemingway voices in terms of vocabulary, sentences structure, stresses, rhythms and more.

Voice Definitions affect your Wriring

“Voice is the right tone for a story” focuses on considering a particular piece of writing.

“Voice is the effect of style” focuses on the craft of writing and manipulating various elements.

“Voice is personality on paper” focuses on relaxing and being yourself.

Donald Murray tries to untangle these in his book, The Craft of Revision, 4th Edition (NOT the Fifth edition, which omits the chapter, “Rewrite with Voice”):

“Many of the qualities writers call voice have been called style in the past, but writers today generally reject that term. Style implies something that can be bought off the rack, something that can be easily imitated. Tone is another word used, but it seems limited to one aspect of writing. Voice is a more human term, and one with which we are familiar.”

Hold on. It gets even muddier, because we can not only talk about Bardic Voices, but also formal versus colloquial voices. Confused? Yes. I understand why editors resist defining voice, why they insist they know it when they hear it, but they can’t use words to explain it. Voice is all of these things: tone, style, personality, formal, bardic and much more. Voice comes in as many varieties as humans.

How then, can we approach studying voice and trying to “find our voices” or “find the right voice for this story”?

My Priority: Revision Strategies

In the end, I want something practical, not mystical. I thought about what Stephanie said in the comments last week:

“I think though, that it’s a give and take between mysticism and conscious choice that emerges during the revision process.”

She may be right that voice is both the conscious and subconscious–the right brain and the left brain–that combine to create something distinctive as you revise. But even if she’s right, it doesn’t lead me to a revision strategy that works. For me, the best way into voice is through style. I find that as I focus on matters of style, of craft, that my subconscious does the other work of straightening out plot, character, dialogue and other story elements; as I focus on matters of style, of craft, voice does emerge. Maybe in the end, I don’t care about a definition of voice either. What I care about is a revision strategy that helps me find the right voice for this story.

Style does that for me: consideration of vocabulary, sentences, punctuation, rhythms, formality, etc. lets me reach for voice in a practical way, while freeing my subconscious to do its work.

Focusing on style to reach for voice has one big advantage to me as a teacher: it keeps me from interfering with a student’s voice. Several years ago, the local university where I teach held a Freshman Writing conference, which consisted of freshman reading papers written in Freshman Composition class. Freshman Composition is a strange class because I almost never get the A/B students: they test out or go to the Honors College. I almost never get the D/F students: they don?t come to college. Instead, I get a strange mix of B/C/D students and usually, they dread my class and expect it to be one of the hardest classes they take; they plan their schedules around my class, giving them plenty of time before (so they can work at the last minute) and plenty of time after (so they can moan about the difficulties the class imposes).

That year, though, I had a student who had come back to college after laying out for a while and, really, he shouldn’t have been in Freshman Composition, his writing was so good. His essay won first place in the Freshman Writing Conference, which carried a nice cash prize that year. Another professor commented on the excellence of his writing and I responded that he was easy to teach because he came in writing well.

“Oh,” the professor said, “those are the hard ones because you have to try hard not to destroy their voices.”

That surprised me. Why would teaching destroy their voice? Oh, believe me, I know it happens. But not in my teaching. When I focus on giving writers (even freshman writers) choices about style, they make choices that strengthen their voices. Focusing on “personality on paper” exercises seems too vague for my tastes as a teacher. But style gives writers something concrete to work on, to focus on; yet, while their focus is on these style elements, other “very good and very interesting” things happen sideways. In the end, it’s the revision that matters. My students revise their first essay for me eight times, focusing each time on a specific style issue. They often say, “This is the best thing I’ve ever written.”

Duh.

It’s the only thing they’ve revised eight times. It’s the only time their voice has ever been so strong.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Wisdom, the Midway Albatross

by Darcy Pattison

Giveaway ends March 11, 2012.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter to win